A Year in Provence ... Part 2

So having rekindled my love affair with 'la bonne vie', what to do about it? Now I'm not naive, I know the dream often does not meet the reality. So let's start with what I did not like about my trip. 

Firstly, mosquitoes. I've always been some what of an attraction for these critters. Whilst my wife remained bite free, I was bitten to shreds and am still scratching myself raw. Secondly, the bloody cockerels waking me up at 05:30, and then virtually 'snoozing' to repeat their bird song every ten minutes. Now I think I was getting used to this as I seemed to notice it less and wake up later as the week went on. 

Finally, the sun. Yes the very thing that makes it so attractive. By 09:00 it was already on its way to 30. On such a short holiday you feel compelled to make hay, as they say, whilst the sun shines but it was far too hot some days and made for uncomfortable nights sleeping. Given more than a week I guess I would acclimatise more but at the same time would have to adopt a more European approach to the midday sun and escape it. 

From an economic point of view the pound is recovering, French property prices have been falling whilst French property taxes have been rising. In the past, UK ex-pats have often set up businesses to serve other ex-pats but with an increasing number of ex-pats returning to the UK this is hitting them. The other favourite is having holiday properties to let but there is already an abundance of these.

With all of the volatility in the EU at the moment the Euro has suffered and could further suffer if countries like Greece and Spain decline further. Ex-pat pensioners have already suffered with currency fluctuations. If the UK withdrew from the Euro zone then working and living in France would become even harder.

Divorce rates for couples who emigrate to France are high, chances of employment for non-French speaking persons are low. The French education system does not go out of its way to accommodate non-French speaking children often setting them back a year to compensate and not providing further help. Private schooling is better but only add to the cost of living.

So where does this leave my French dream? Well from a schooling point alone it puts it on hold until the kids finish school by which time I will be nearing retirement but I do not want to wait that long which brings us back to compromise. Being a home worker I can work from home, wherever that may be, as long as I have a decent internet connection. With kids being at school they have six weeks summer holiday each year. So I like the idea of letting a property for one month each year abroad. Maybe Provence one year, Tuscany another, Murcia the next, who knows.

But there remains an obstacle. Finance. My wife currently still needs to work and cannot get that much time off. So either she needs a job or business that allows her to work remotely or I need to earn enough for her not to work! Hmmmm......????

A Year in Provence ... Part I

... or at least a week in Poitou Charante but it's still time in France right? What a breathe of fresh air, quite literally, a family holiday in a rural gîte. 'Rustic' was initially the word of the week as it seemed to cover all manner of accommodation short comings but strangely as the week went on they seemed less relevant and our initial gripes were perhaps just residue of our normal life and expectations.

Like many, I long to escape the rat race and have often said that if I could live anywhere in Europe it would be about half way down France. From there you are but a days drive from Spain, Italy, Belgium, Holland, Germany, Austria, Switzerland, Czech Republic, and the UK to name a few which makes it a perfect hub. A hub from which you readily gain access to beaches, lakes, rivers, snow capped mountains, or whatever other landscape takes your fancy. Furthermore, you can pick your climate. Further north for more 'English' weather, further south for more Mediterranean weather.

Waking up, an alfresco coffee and pain au chocolat for breakfast in the early morning sun and no further motivation was required for a run in the glorious and spectacular fields of sunflowers and vines. Admittedly I got a few strange looks from the local farmers (the French don't do exercise as a rule) but this did not deter me.

Upon my return a quick shower then into the swimming pool with the family for more 'exercise' under the guise of play. In fact I have come back browner, slimmer, and fitter. A break for a lunch of a baguette, fromage and jambon whilst escaping the too hot midday sun then a spot of sunbathing before plunging back into the pool to cool off. Come the evening and it's time to fire up the barbeque and start the drinks flowing. After managing to get the kids to settle in bed, some more drinking and socialising with guests from the neighbouring gîtes, and even a bit of impromptu ukulele! 

Finally, rounding the evening off lying on a blanket gazing at the truly magnificent night sky. The rural location being free from light 'pollution' the view was like someone had suddenly upgraded my usual night sky to HD, my eyes now free to see the milky way, satellites, shooting stars and constellations. This soon became part of the pre-bedtime ritual.

I wanted a holiday 'unplugged' and pretty much achieved this bar the quick email check and using an mp3 player for some tunes while chatting or catching up with some reading. The kids scraped through without iPads, pc's, DS's, or tv and thankfully since returning haven't demanded them back into their lives yet either. In fact before the holiday I couldn't get them out of the house, tonight I struggled to get them back in.

Simple pleasures indeed and I guess that's all I really desire. The French have always somehow managed to retain the appreciation of simple pleasures like food, wine, song and socialising. I liked the idea of living in France before, and I like the idea even more now.

Curse of the home worker

The are many advantages to working from home but it is not so straight-forward as one might think, especially if you have a wife that works part-time as well as being a mum. Being at home frequently can make you become a household 'resource' despite the fact that it is your place of work.

Little things start to slip in. "Are you going to be in if I get the groceries delivered?". Of course once the groceries are delivered at the very least the fridge and freezer stuff needs to be put away.

"If I put a laundry load on can you hang it out?". Invariably it will rain and I will have to bring it in and then the sun will come out and I'll be expected to hang it back out and of course it's not two sheets, it's about 100 pairs of kids socks and knickers.

"Can you put the dinner in the oven at .... ?", which of course becomes "and turn it over/serve it up if I'm running late".

Arguments about doing the washing up have advanced with technology to arguing about who loads/unloads the dishwasher.

Then of course there is the ad-hoc school drop off/pick ups, trip to doctors, nipping out to pick up some urgent groceries, the watching the kids whilst "I pop out quickly" or "go to my exercise classes". 

When they get in from work there is also the air of "I've been busy/at work all day and you've been at home so it's  my turn for a break whilst you help out". 

Maybe I sound like a dinosaur but as the major source of income to the household I think my work at least deserve some consideration. Rant over. Still love her.

Size Matters

I think an important gauge in a relationship is the size of the things that annoy you or cause arguments. My wife is lazy very efficient/economical. Like Lewis Hamilton, if she can shave of a few seconds here and there through out the day she will. For example, we recently installed fitted wardrobes in our bedroom that have sliding doors. The doors alone cost around £300. My wife saves time by constantly leaving the doors open. Had I factored this in then as well as saving time we could have saved £300.

Another example is her keys, again she saves time by placing them at the first convenient place upon entry to our home. The place varies subject to what is most convenient at that particular moment. This does however seem to cause an issue the next day when she is late for work and cannot find them consequently spending five minutes running around the house cursing,  frantically looking for them.

Similarly, our kitchen has limited cupboard space. The best way around this limitation is to stack/organise items within the cupboard. My wife found this cost her valuable seconds and has found it far more efficient to grab an item and then when replacing it put it to the front of the cupboard and push everything else back. The challenge is further compounded by the fact that when doing the weekly shopping my wife purchases pretty much the same things each week saving valuable time by not checking what we already have. (It's not been unheard of to find four large boxes of All Bran taking up half a shelf). However, this seems to cost me time due to the fact that every time I open a cupboard, any cupboard, several items fall out and I then struggle to fit them back in the cupboard.

Of course my wife is not really lazy. She has a part-time job, looks after our kids, does the housework, etc, etc. So I guess my point is that if little things like these are my biggest gripes then I guess we're doing ok.

Is the glass half empty or half full?

I had a discussion with a very good friend of mine in the pub about this. We both have similar incomes, are married, have kids, nice homes and in many ways our lives are similar. However, where as he fills totally fulfilled I do not. I must stress as I did with he that this in no way means that I do not love my family or life any less. I believe my family mean every bit as much to me as his does to him and in that respect are wholly equal.

I've had similar discussions with other friends and sometimes, strangely, it seems a bone of contention. Some, particularly wives, seem outraged that I should possibly want more than I have, more than they have (or perhaps just dislike me for prompting their husbands to consider the question). Yet at the same time I feel, probably unjustifiably, they're often trying to convince themselves that what they have is enough and that agreeing or empathising with me would be acknowledging a lack of fulfilment. 

The truth is I think neither is true. As we're talking about a pub conversation let's put it into a pub context. Let's suppose that two men both order half a pint of beer. One person has his served in a half pint glass which is full, the other has a pint glass that is half empty/full (not going to get into that one). Both have equal quantities of beer, but one has the capacity for more and hence has a feeling that there is room for more.

To be honest I was quite pleased with my analogy but this seemed to anger some even more. How dare I suggest that my glass was larger than theirs, blah, blah, rant! Guess there's no pleasing some people ....